“Snort or I’ll cut your baby.” That was the last straw for me. Literally. Do enough so my dad can get paid and he can do whatever he wants with the money. Maybe he’ll sleep tonight. Maybe the wife will sleep, too. I’d get two for one then. The knife’s not where he usually leaves it. Neither is the gun. They must know they’re pushing their luck with me.
How can I get everyone out safely? It’s too dangerous to run at night. Too many people coming and going, and Peter is so slow. Wait. I could get both boys after school. We can go right now. Casey is already dressed. I don’t think she’ll need any heavy clothes. I zip my maternity jacket half-closed, hold a sleeping baby Casey inside. Hope she stays quiet for now. Stuff some clean diapers into my backpack, throw it on my back, time to head out.
“I have to drop some school stuff at Josie’s,” I yell to whoever is listening.
“Don’t be late,” Martha, the wife, snarls. “You have a four o’clock appointment.”
“I’ll be back soon.”
“Don’t be late!”
The back doors slam shut behind me. George’s school lets out first, so I take Casey the eight blocks there. I have to reach Tammy. She said she’d help us get away. I hope George still has his phone. Mine was confiscated because of a “bad performance.” If he doesn’t, we’ll have to walk fourteen blocks to Tammy’s office, and I’m not sure if Peter will make it.
Ten year old George is one of the last kids to get out of his elementary school. He sees me on the corner and comes over.
“What’s going on?” he asks. We head for five year old Peter’s school.
“We’re leaving,” I tell him.
“What do you mean?”
“As in we’re not going home. Ever. Do you have your phone on you?”
“But Michele, I don’t have anything with me. No books or clothes or anything.”
“We’ll have to get those on the road,” I say. “Do you have your phone?”
He gets it out. “Who’re you calling?”
“Tammy. She’s going to help us get out of here.”
“Do you want me to hold Casey?”
“No, thanks. She’s asleep now, and I’d like to keep it that way.”
George dials then gives me the phone.
“Hey, little bud!” on the other side of the call.
“Hey, it’s me,” I answer.
“Sorry, Michele. What’s up?”
“We’re leaving.”
A moment of silence then, “Okay. Where are you now?”
“Getting Peter from school.”
“You’ve got the other kids?”
“Yes.”
“Meet me at the Greasy Spoon. Order me the sweet style ribs, okay? Make it look as if you’re customers.”
“That’s actually great. I’m sure the boys are hungry anyway.”
“I’ll meet you there in about half an hour.”
“Thanks, Tammy.”
“Don’t thank me yet. See you soon, cuz.” We click off, and I give the phone back to George.
“What’s the plan?” he asks.
“We’re going to meet Tammy at the Greasy Spoon.” That’s six blocks further away from our dad’s place.
“Great, because I’m hungry. I have lunch money I didn’t use this week.”
“Cool. We can at least have a decent snack there.”
The Greasy Spoon isn’t so busy we have to wait long to be seated but there are enough people that we get a booth towards the back.
“Mom, can I please get a cheeseburger?” Peter begs. George is sitting next to him on the outside of the booth. Casey is sitting on my lap, playing with a spoon.
“You’re going to get a junior cheeseburger, Peter,”
“And chocolate milk to drink?”
“Fine, but only one tonight.”
Tammy slides in next to me. “Hi. Sorry I’m late,” she says.
“It’s okay,” George says, “they haven’t gotten around to us yet.”
And just then, our waiter appears. “Hi, I’m Jeffrey, I’ll be your server today. Can I get you any drinks?”
“We’re ready to order, actually,” I tell him. Pointing to Peter, I say “he’ll have a junior cheeseburger, medium rare, no bacon, no fries, and a small chocolate milk. I’ll have a regular burger with fries, medium rare, and an iced tea to drink.”
“I’m having sweet style ribs,” George says, “and a large chocolate milk.”
“I’ll have the same,” Tammy says, “with fries.” Jeffrey goes away. “So, what do you guys have in the way of cash or phones or anything?” she asks.
“I have my phone,” George tells her.
“And I have about eight hundred dollars,” I report.
“You’re rich, mommy!”
“First, stop yelling, please, Peter. Second, it’s not a lot of money for four people to live off.”
“You hold onto that then, Michele,” Tammy says. “We’ll figure things out tonight. Are you high?”
“Right now? I don’t think so. The last time I used was yesterday.”
“Okay. We’ll see how that goes tonight, too.” Tammy turns to George. “What about you?”
“Me? Drugs? No way. I stay the hell away from all that.”
“Nobody made you do things you didn’t want to?” she presses.
“Dad tried once, but the lady said I was too young for her.” Count on a customer to save the day.
That was four days ago. Or five. I don’t remember. I do remember shaking so hard I thought my brains would rattle out of my head through my nose and ears and mouth. And Peter had snakes all over him, but Tammy said that wasn’t true. And George’s head swelled up and turned dark blue, almost purple. Tammy said that wasn’t true either. Every time I wanted to move, I threw up ‘til there wasn’t even any slimy stuff in my stomach. Keep the customer happy. How can I do that if I can’t even move or keep my head on straight?
“Is she dead?” That sounds like Peter.
“No,” Tammy tells him. “She’s just really sick right now.”
Open my eyes a little bit, there he is, no snakes, just uncombed hair on his head.
“If she’s this sick, she should see a doctor, Tammy,” Peter continues.
“Hey, bud,” I try. “What’re you up to?”
“You should see a doctor, mom,” he says. George and Tammy join the party. There’s another bed in this room. We must be in a hotel.
“I don’t need a doctor, hon. I just needed to sleep a little.” I sit up slowly. Good news - my stomach doesn’t want to throw up anymore. Peter hops up into bed next to me.
“Are you hungry?” Tammy asks.
“I’d like a hamburger, please,” Peter says.
“Michele?”
“Maybe some pasta with butter?”
“Okay. You probably should change, too. We got you some clothes. Nothing stylish, but it’ll do.”
Peter jumps off the bed. “Look, mom, a real suitcase for all my stuff.” He shows me a rolling bag that’s almost as big as he is. “I have some of Casey’s things, too, but look!”
“That’s great, Peter,” I say.
“We even got Casey a car seat,” George reports.
“Oh, Casey,” I sigh. “How is she?”
“Sleeping like a baby,” Peter says as he gets up next to me again.
“We also have to make arrangements,” Tammy tells me. “I have to be at work by eleven tomorrow. We can stick you in another hotel,”
“No,” I reply. “We’ve got to get to the next point. I can make the call.”
Tammy gets her phone out. “I’ll take care of that. Kate, right?”
“Yes. Tell her you don’t like Easter because you can’t catch the bunny.”
Peter giggles. “Of course you can’t catch the Easter bunny, mom. He has to get all the eggs all over the world.”
“All right, Peter. Do you have to pee before we go have dinner?” I ask him.
“No.”
“Better go make sure,” I say.
“Come with me?”
“Oh, Peter.”
“Please?”
“Fine. Okay.” We go into the room with the toilet, second sink, and tub. Peter closes the door. He pulls down his pants.
“Oh. I do have to pee after all, mom.”
“Good. Focus on the toilet, please.”
He turns his attention to the task at hand. “Mom, are you ever going to be sick like that again?”
“No, baby. I promise. What do we do when we’re finished?” He takes a wad of toilet paper and wipes both the seat and the floor around the toilet. “And that goes ...”
“I forget.”
“In the toilet.” He drops it in and flushes. “And what do we do next?” I turn the water on in the sink. Peter washes his hands. “Good. Well done, young man.” He hugs me and giggles as he wipes his hands on my shirt. “Peter Dalton.”
“I missed you, mommy.”
“I know. It won’t happen again. I promise.”
A knock at the bathroom door. Tammy looks in. “New plan. We’re going to visit Kate,” she says.
“We’re going to Kate and Frankie’s? We can play with the dogs all day, right? And their park has a pool, we can go there, too, right?”
“We are guests in Kate’s house, Peter,” I tell him. “We’ll follow what rules Kate has for us. Understood?”
“Yes, mom. Does that mean I can’t get my hamburger tonight?”
“We just need to take it to go, okay?” Tammy smiles.
Peter looks at me. “I think we all should go pee then.”
“Sounds like a plan,” I answer. He hugs me quickly, then he and Tammy leave me alone.
**********
Keep the customer happy. Doesn’t matter if they hold so tight you can’t breathe or it hurts so bad you bleed. Got to provide for your family. No matter what. Please let me live ‘til tomorrow. I promise I’ll do better.
“Michele.”
My eyes pop open. It’s dark. How did I get in a car? Look to my left, Tammy’s driving.
“Hey,” she says. I look in the back seat to see George, Peter, and Casey. “Sorry to wake you, but we get off at exit 21, right?”
“Hm? Yes,” I respond. “You need to stay to the left on the exit or we’ll end up in the ocean.”
“We can swim in the ocean?” Peter asks.
“No,” George answers. “We’re going to Kate’s house.”
Tammy turns off at exit 21. “Good,” I say, “now stay here because this turns into the middle lane.”
“And now we go to exit 14, right?”
“Yes. Two exits after the bridge.” Close my eyes. There’s one guy I can’t get out of my head no matter how hard I try. He’s so rough, my dad has to give me a couple days off to recoup. And this guy always brings his son. Lucky the son just watches. Somehow it always costs more to watch than to participate. I don’t think I’ll ever figure that one out.
“Mom, I’m hungry.”
“Dude,” George sighs, “there’s no more food for us in the car. You have to wait ‘til Kate’s house.”
“And I have to pee.”
Before I can answer, Tammy says, “there is a diner a couple exits from here. There was a billboard for it a few miles ago.”
“All right, Peter, but we’re only getting a snack, okay?” I tell him. “And then there are no more stops ‘til we get to Kate’s house.”
“Thanks, mom.”
“Thank Tammy. She’s driving.”
“Thank you, Tammy.”
“No problem, bud.”
The diner is on a dark block about a half mile away from the highway. There are four other cars in the large parking lot.
“Tammy, do they have junior cheeseburgers here?” Peter asks.
“I don’t know. How about a chocolate milkshake? Will that be enough to get to Kate’s?”
“Peter and I will split a grilled cheese sandwich,” I tell Tammy. “George, do you want anything?”
“Grilled cheese sounds good,” he says.
Tammy gets out first and goes inside. George unstraps Peter from his booster seat, and I take Peter into the bathroom. We go right past Tammy, as if we don’t know her. For better or worse, the bathroom is made for one person in each space.
“Mom, I have to poop.”
“So you know what to do.”
He does know what to do. As he washes his hands, I use the facilities as well. “Aren’t you glad we stopped, too, mom?”
“It certainly was convenient. Dry your hands, please.” He wipes his hands on his jacket, I wipe mine on my shirt, and we are back in the car in no time. George buckles Peter into his booster seat. Tammy passes the food out.
“George, I know you like vanilla, so I got you a shake, too.”
“Thanks, Tammy. I can hold Peter’s stuff, too.” George balances all the food in his lap.
“Can Casey have some of my sandwich?” Peter asks. “I don’t want her going hungry, mom.”
“Casey has her own food. George can feed her if she gets hungry.”
“Okay,” he says with a full mouth. Tammy drinks down half her chocolate milk shake before getting us back on the highway. Tammy, what exit are we at?” Peter asks.
“We’re coming up on exit three.”
“Peter, please let Tammy drive,” I tell him. Silence from the back seat. We’ll see how long that lasts.
**********
"Snort of I cut your baby." I wouldn't have really believed him except he has the knife in his other hand. One hand on my arm, one hand holding the boonie knife. At least that's what they call it. Not as big as a machete but definitely larger than a steak knife. I saw Martha use it once when she thought someone shorted her money for drugs. I was supposed to be sleeping, but dad told me to go get Martha. Instead of interrupting her, I got my ass kicked by him when I told him I couldn't find her. Kate's going to kick my ass if we're late tonight. Kate. She won't hurt a fly.
Open my eyes to see exit 12 go by. Tammy's still driving strong. I look in the back seat. I can't tell if George is sleeping or just resting his eyes. Peter and Casey are definitely asleep. Maybe they'll sleep through the night. Exit 13 then 13A, 13B, and then it's our turn to get off the highway. Exit 14 seems a world away from where we came from. There’s not even a traffic light at the end of the exit.
"Are you up?" Tammy asks quietly.
“Yes," I answer just as quietly. "Right at the stop sign, then right again after the train tracks. We’ve got a little bit before that.”
“Did you sleep at all?” Tammy asks.
“I think I can do that while we’re here,” I answer. “What about you? I’m sure you could stay the night.”
“I need to get back. I can’t be late tomorrow morning, or I would stay.”
We cross over a bunch of railroad tracks. “The second right,” I say. She turns onto a narrow street. Almost all the stores are closed, but the bar and restaurants are still open. “And it’s the sixth house after the speed limit changes to 55.”
“All right.”